Ok so I had an interesting week to say the least!!! A few topics came up for the blog and I said hmmm where do I begin. Now let me say this, this topic right here is not for the faint of heart. If you got issues with folks cheating or screwing around, this BLOG is NOT FOR YOU!!!! This Blog is for the Sidechicks and some of it applies to women looking for love in all the wrong places, so I will try to address both. I know yall gonna want me to say being a side chick is wrong or if you a Side Chick you must have low Self Esteem, blah blah Blah!!! Well this AIN’T THAT BLOG!!! Cuz all side chicks ain’t depressed and some of them some Bad Bitches!! If you think I’m lying, take a look at the photo above….. hmmm need I say more!!! I been there before And OMG I am not the devil, I am just willing to admit it and hopefully I can teach the next young lady a thing or 2, so don’t crucify me. If you are going to crucify me atleast buy me a DRINK first, lol. I know yall want me to tell the sidechick Not to do it!! Thats just like telling a teenager not to have sex, they are going to do it anyway, so allow me to give the Sidechicks of the World some tools not to be stupid. Trust this is beneficial to the women in relationships as well, because if the Side Chicks aren't as Dumb, men wouldn't have as many options. Most of them can't afford a side chick with some damn sense.
So here we go, a friend of mine inboxed me and said I need you to write about woman with low self esteem allowing men to just run all over them. She knows two chicks dating the same man and they both know about each other. She knows another chick who is dealing with a man that lives with another woman, which has been going on for a year. Then she knows another woman who was with a man for 10 years and he left her with 2 kids and married another woman. And now he's cheating on his wife with the previous chick. Woah NELLY!!! This was a lot to take in. She implied that they must have low self esteem. I advised her not necessarily LOW SELF Esteem, these Hoes may JUST be DUMB!!! I would need to know more about the particulars of the Situation in order to truly know if they dumb, have low self esteem, or IF they JUST BUTT UGLY!!! LOL, I really don’t know!!
In the same week another homey of mine asked me if she was considered single if she was seeing a man that wasn’t hers. Now let me start here, because I think a lot of women get it twisted when dating someone else man. Married, engaged, seperated, somebody boyfriend, All the scenarios above!!! HE AIN’T YOURS!!! So to even ask me this sounds crazy, OF COURSE YOUR ASS IS Single, there is nothing committed about your relationship, HE GOT A CHICK/GIRL/WIFE/WIFEY!! That ain’t your MAN!! Now do I see anything wrong with someone seeing some one else’s man, if they just boyfriend and girlfriend, uhm NOPE not really (notice I didn’t say wife because I respect the sanctity of marriage, thanks My Princy) unless yall related or friends or have close mutual friends, then that’s a problem!!! You don’t want an all out Jerry Springer moment going down cuz ya sleeping with your BFF man!! OH HELL NO, You deserve to get yo ass beat!! But as I always said and always will say the Next bitch don’t owe me or YOU a DAMN THING. Now if it’s my Man and you’re screwing him, HELL YEA, it’s a problem!!! She don’t owe me anything, but he does!! I take up all issues with the real culprit, HIM!! Biased YES, but hey that’s LIFE, everything ain’t meant to be fair. Get over it!!! It’s a black man shortage so the next hoe gonna come for yours and mine. Its like musical chairs, the most aggressive person wins, and when the music stops there is usually only one chair left!! The next bitch is coming for your seat!! It’s the reality of the situation, either ya got the seat on lock or you don’t!! Now either way if you decide to play music chairs with another Chick and Her MAN, you Gotta KNOW IT’s RULES TO THIS SHIT!!! Or F*ck it, even if he don’t have a woman, if yall ain’t committed some of these rules STILL APPLY. Especially if he screwing you and “Keisha” and you want more and are looking for a relationship from this man and he knows it because you two had the talk already. Now if you are not looking for anything and your just single and ready to mingle, then DO YOU and take what you want out of what I have to say. Either Way its Still Rules to this Shit, you to old to be Young, Dumb and Full of C*M!!! (Excuse my language but if I say it politely some folks just don’t understand)!!
Here we go, put on your Mac Make Up and get Pretty, because it’s about to get REAL Ugly!! I told you if you can’t handle it then Stop READING!! This is SPARTA
1. If you are not his girl, YOU ARE SINGLE!!! His purpose is to buy you trinkets and to keep the number of sexual encounters on your jacket low while you are exploring your other dating options. This applies if he got a girl. If he don’t have a girl and doesn’t want to commit, then the fact that you are single still applies.
That means date, date and date some more, I didn’t say sleep around I said DATE. Why the hell are you sitting in the house because a man that ain’t yours told you to or implied that you should. That’s like when u was little and the lady from down the street told you to put a coat on!!! First thing that came out of your mouth was “YOU AIN’T MY MAMA.” How in the hell did you get dumber with AGE?!?! She wasn’t your mama and he ain’t your Man.
2. If he is in a committed Relationship, He is not a good catch!!! He Cheats and he is CHEATING WITH YOU!!! Can you say Karma!!! If you guys are dating but he also has his fair share of hoodrats, scallywags and scoundrels ALL OVER and you are looking for a committed relationship and you guys have had THE TALK and nothing Happens, sorry Sunshine he is not a good CATCH EITHER!! Either he a HOE or U just ain’t the Girl For HIM!! If a man wants to be with you he will, regardless of what else is going on is his life. So either way you lose.
Now do I believe once a cheater always a cheater, no I do not. I don’t believe just because he cheated on her, he will cheat on me, cuz the bottom line is that Bitch ain’t me!! She a Ford and I am a Maybach!!! I got a Maybach Bitch mentality!!! I’m Top of the line and she the Bottom of the Barrel!!! Shit, I would cheat on a damn Ford too, lol!!! But the bottom line is in this scenario, if he is in a committed relationship and if he is cheating on her with you and he leaves her, that is not a good thing!! That is KARMA and oh my, my, my!!! Karma is a bad Bitch, probably one of the baddest ones I know!!! 9 times out of 10 he ain’t going to leave because if that was the case he would have done it already, plus he already hitting it, so he not going anywhere. Your Goal here is not to make this guy your guy!!! HE CHEATS!!
Now if he is single and you are looking for a committed relationship and he giving you every reason in the world why he don’t want to be in one even though yall technically do everything relationships do. Yall screwing, yall over eachothers house every night and you cooking dinner. DO NOT PASS
3. Now if he in a relationship and He said he is only still their because of the KIDS, He lying!!! Or if he single and He can’t be in a relationship because if his Babymother find out she is going to keep the KIDS away, HE LYING About that TOO!!!
WTH?!?! This is you getting too emotionally involved and allowing yourself to be Dickmatized!!! Oh yes it is a word!! This man done put it on you and now you just believe any ole crock of BS that he says. You just STUPID!!! This is a bold face flat out lie and any man that says he is involved and gives you the kids as a reason for why he is staying is a COWARD, with no backbone and is just telling you what the hell you need to hear so he can keep on hitting it!! That right this is ONE of the Lies men tell SOOO THEY can keep on HITTING IT!! Let me ask you this, What black man only stays because of the kids, Half of them don’t even claim or take care of the ones they got, Now we got black men just flat out staying in horrible relationships for they kids!! Really, like Really!!! You believe this crock of Bullshit!! If you do, you stupid!!! I would rather you date the guy who tells you nothing is wrong with their relationship and he just wants to screw. No Harm No Foul!!! And More Importantly, WHY DO YOU EVEN CARE why he is there, once again HE DOES NOT HAVE MATE potential, he is a cheater!!
Now if he can’t be in a committed relationship because of his Baby mama and he telling you she is going to keep the kids away, he lying there too!! We live in NJ, a state with great custody laws. So either he being a Bitch about the situation, got warrants and can’t even step foot in the courthouse, his ass owe child support, he still want to be with his BabyMama or HE JUST NOT THAT INTO YOU!! You figure it out.
4. No doing Wifely Duties when you got JumpOff or Boo Stats!! This applies to Side Chicks and if you a guy “Peoples” as they like to use in reference to the nice pretty girl they screwing and haven’t committed to!!
You cooking and letting that negro stay the night. For What?!?! He need to go lay up with his real girl or one of his hoodrats cuz u not beat. He needs to be wining and dining you, why are you allowing him to do anything but that. Laying up, cooking and stuff, GTFOH!!! Uhm where is the room service or he need to invite you over and cook for you. If you are doing all of this and its somebody else dude, u just plain ole stupid, need I remind you he does not have mate potential, HE CHEATS!!! When you are dating somebody else man and ESPECIALLY somebody else man, those should be the best dates of your life!!! Why? Because it needs to cost him for you to be quiet!! Don’t be Dickmatized. I pity the fool. Once again you are not his girl, treat him like the TRICK that he is! You are cooking, now he not even paying for a meal. Why are you showing him that you even know how to cook. When he ask you when are you going to cook your suppose to say “Can’t make Dinner, but I can Make Reservations!!” in your best Martha Stewart voice. Now if you guys are dating and in the dating stages it is okay to make him a plate every once in a blue, hey gotta show him your not going to burn the house completely down if you turn on the stove, lol. But you have to minimize it and remember you are the prize to be won here not the other way around so you don’t need to be cooking every night. It is not your responsibility to feed him, your not his mama and your not his chick either. Save those wifely duties for the man that you are going to be with and the one that wants to be with you.
I say all of this to say, life is to short for us to invest all our time, feelings and emotions into Mr. Right Now, when we should be out there investing it in Mr.Right. Save your heart for a man who clearly deserves it!!! and make him work for it!! Shout out to MY Maybach Bitches (term of endearment, MY Blog MY RULES) with that Maybach Mentality!!! We are Winning (in my Charle Sheen voice)!!! I love You ALL!! Live, Laugh and Love and enjoy your weekend.
6 comments:
I like!! Great read.
Malikah T.
Happy u enjoyed it Malikah, and thank you for the Support!!! Feel free to share the Link!! Knowledge is Power and Sharing is Caring!!
Its not fair.... Why must you do so much to retain and or keep ya man. I feel like jumping ship like Corporate America and snatching myself one of them guys from Banglore India....
I thank you Keeping it real.
Well Said :D... Soooo many chicks need 2 hear this!! See the thing with me is I haven't been single much in my life... I think the longest period was like 8-9 months definately less than a year BUT I've always been a woman that will ALWAYS deal with the man when it comes to issues of cheating. Don't confuse, its a different situation if I'm violated/disrespected by the female! Anywho, I don't condone cheatin but can admit that I've had a pretty high tolerance for it in the past becuz, along with many other reasons, I believed that the person doin it wld change :/ BUT no matter how I decide to deal with it WITH HIM the side chicks need to KNOW their place-- mainly keep their emotions under control and understand what situation THEY put themselves into becuz a man is only gonna do what u allow him to do!!
Cultivating Patience, u ask a good question WHY must u do so much to retain or keep your MAN, its as simple ass the same reason why we do so much to keep a job!! Sad but true because keeping a man is no different. The reality of the situation is if he wants to cheat he will, just like if a job wants to lay yoiu off they will. Some men cheat because it is simply who they are and others cheat bc they stupid and slip up. As women we have to know if we have a chronic cheater or a dummy on our hands, when to hold them and when to fold em is how I like to put it. I mean honestly its a man shortage out here and not enough women are happy with themselves to the point where they can be alone without being lonely so they put up with the BS!!! If this means being with somebody else man then so be it. On the other hand, These young girls just don't give a fuck, GIRL fuckin with the next chick man is the new double dutch, it is what they do in there free time. Unfortunately that is just the way it is. So keeping a man and keeping up with his extra curricular activities becomes a damn job, I am not telling anyone to play stalker or be a damn Nut, but the bottom line is do your part as far as making sure your job is done, so the next bitch has no entry way. Its musical chairs and if she is more aggressive chick is going to win. now if he cheats, whether or not a woman takes him back is up to her. I don't tell anyone what to do because they know there personal situation better than anyone. Remeber your trash is th next chicks treasure. Just liek somebody elses trash may be your treasure. THat is just the way it is.
Thanks again for posting your thoughts. You do a fantastic job of keeping things real. And a few of your post made me check myself……..
I've been single since 2007. I have been dating some pretty intelligent, nice looking, financially established men. What I find is that I'm not ready. It’s a void of emptiness that will linger inside of you when you’re not totally in love with self. The emotions that haunt you when you’re not totally ready will run any eligible man away. I’m telling you, I was with my high school sweet heart for 19 years. After my separation I was depressed, desperate and looking for someone to love me at a level that I didn’t love my damn self. Desperate energy attracts men, but not the ones that will satisfy you completely. I thank god that I leveled my emotions and learned my worth. Yes, I am a MayBach chick and I bring hella lot to the table. So if a dude wants to run around with the next chick, SO BE IT. I’m not tryna control him. I have a hard enough time trying to control what I eat. So my thing is being like you said, emotionally intelligent enough to know when to roll them or when to fold them.
My suggestion to single women is get themselves right (this is my mission right now). I'm quite sure its somebody for everybody. You just have to be ready when he comes. Educate yourself, learn how to keep a clean house, GET A HOBBY, learn how to cook, travel, diversify your conversation, and understand what makes you happy. Its so many women crying about being single and can't cook, won't allow anyone to dare comment on the behavior of the bad ass kids, don't keep a clean house, they mad as hell at they baby daddies, they worry to much about named brand clothes, and not enough about morals.
So I pose another thought for you my sister. How do you feel about polygamy? I being a muslimah get those kinds of offers all the time. Do you think that the women that deal with married men deserve to be recognized as a co-wife? I’ve seen it work for some couples.
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